My uncle passed away last Thursday. I didn't know him very well since he was on my mom Pam's side. What I do remember of him was that he was always friendly, loved to make people smile, and kept you cracking up with his humor. I saw him last after our wedding when my mom was staying with him. Full of life and happy as ever. His death came as a shock and surprise to us all.

I got a call from my mom Pam last Thursday when my parents were down visiting us. I didn't get to the phone the first time she called. She called back within minutes and I knew something wasn't right. I answered and she told me that uncle Henry was in open heart surgery due to a heart aneurysm. The doctor said that there was a 75% chance he'd live through the surgery and a 25% chance that he wouldn't. She said she'd keep me updated as she knew. My mom was very distraught as this was her only brother left (her other brother had died many years ago before I was even born in a car accident.)

She called me back that night at midnight weeping. I just knew. Then she said the words no one ever wants to hear, "Jess, he didn't make it. We had to let him go. The doctor said that if he went through another surgery they would most likely have to amputate his legs, one of his kidneys had failed, and would suffer extreme brain damage." She then told me that the doctor recommended they let him go since his body stopped fighting. One of the hardest decisions for her and my aunt to make. They let him go.

Now, like I mentioned earlier, I didn't know my uncle Henry very well, but I cried. I cried a lot. I cried with my mom on the phone all the while my husband holding me. I listened to my mom weep and say she didn't know what to do. She then asked me a very hard question to answer.

She said, "Jess, where is he going?" I told her I didn't know, but we needed to trust in God that His will was done. (My uncle was very openly gay and wasn't a professing believer)

One of the hardest questions I've ever faced. It's hard to know what to tell someone grieving so much. All I could do was offer my ear to listen as she poured out her heart to me. She was angry. She was angry with God for taking him so soon. She was angry that He took her only family member she had any sort of relationship with. She was despairing saying that she'll never get over it.

I cried so much. I cried for our loss, but also for her heart. Here was my mother in need of her Saviour and so I kept on telling her to lean on Him. She couldn't do this by herself and although we might question as to why this was His will; it's all for His glory. Comforting someone is hard. You want to be able to say the right thing to turn them back to Christ instead of letting them turn against Him.

She called me the other day after she flew back to Vancouver to prepare for his funeral that she is doing better now that she has seen his body and can have peace.

The story behind this sudden death was my uncle had high blood pressure for many years without knowing it. He went to the doctor complaining of back pain and when they checked him out they found a serious problem. He had a blood clot in his heart that had twisted and formed a knot that tore through his heat. He was bleeding internally. They rushed him to the hospital where before entering surgery, he instructed his friend who was with him to call his family. They then took him into the OR where they put him on a heart machine that pumped his heart for him while they worked on him. Everything was going well until they took him off. The right side of his heart stopped working and began pumping blood into his lungs. That's when his kidney failed and the blood circulation stopped flowing to his legs (thus the reason for wanting to amputate) and his body gave up fighting.

Please pray for my mom as she's struggling with the situation and her faith because of this.

Please pray that we can give her encouragement and the right words for this time.

Jessica~